Simple Pleasures…Even When Life’s Hard

Another mom asked me last week how I could possibly have any margin for helping other moms when I’m living in the same chaos.

Good question.

I’ve been thinking about it ever since she asked.

On a practical level, I have the best husband E.V.E.R. who is doing a lot of the practical things such as cooking and homeschooling, so I can focus on helping others. Additionally, while we have a lot going on and a lot of stress, we feel safe. That is not always the case when a family has a really fragile child.

On an emotional level, I’ve had to do a lot of healing myself. Even just a year ago, I struggled to read posts on most adoption support Facebook groups. They left me feeling hopeless, snarky, and resentful.

Part of my healing journey has been realizing what types of activities fill me up and help me move forward in life. I thought for a long time that I was most effective when I was meeting my kids’ needs. But instead, I felt like I was pouring my soul into a black hole.

[bctt tweet=”‘I thought for a long time that I was most effective when I was meeting my kids’ needs.’ Read why this mom was wrong. #parenting” username=”corkboardblog”]

Now, I understand that the greatest return on my investment is prioritizing my needs and defining success in ways that have absolutely nothing to do with how my kids are behaving or the decisions that they are making.

Yesterday, as part of my save-my-sanity-self-care-plan, I went out on a walk. It was unseasonably warm at almost 50 degrees, but foggy and misty. As I was walking, I started noticing rain drops perched on trees, grass, and dying flowers.

There was this simple beauty all around me. And that beauty was there for me to enjoy regardless of what was going on circumstantially in life.

Even if you’re at the end of your rope with your kids.

Even if you’re feeling like a failure as a mom.

Even if you have no hope left.

[bctt tweet=”There are simple pleasures all around if we stop long enough to pay attention.” username=”corkboardblog”]

Maybe it’s nature.

Maybe it’s a hot cup of something yummy.

Maybe it’s a smile from a stranger.

Maybe it’s sneaking a piece of chocolate and a glass of wine.

Take some time this week to look for the little things.

What are your simple pleasures?

Share them on Instagram and tag them #corkboardblog so we can all enjoy each other’s simple pleasures.


  1. HollyDecember 4, 2018

    yes. i feel you on this.

    1. MelissaDecember 10, 2018

      You are not alone.

  2. BelindaDecember 3, 2018

    Thank you Melissa! This post was really helpful to me, mostly the importance of meeting my own needs (without guilt). “We feel safe” resonated with me too. I’m being vulnerable here: I long to have a home where we all feel (emotionally and mentally) safe. I’m on the beginning of my healing journey. I’m looking forward to learning more. Thank you again

    1. MelissaDecember 10, 2018

      You’re making great steps to get there! You can do it!

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