It’s easy when parenting to be controlled by the urgent. Tantruming toddlers, teacher conferences, markers on the wall, mouthy teenagers. It all feels like it needs our attention…pronto! We figure once we put out the fire, meet our kids’ needs, and correct them until we’re sure they’re not going to jail, THEN we can take care...
When parents feel like they are constantly butting heads with their child, we often talk about using parenting tools that help our kids feel like we’re on their team. One popular way is to collaborate with our kids using a compromise. We’ve told our kids repeatedly, “When we tell you to do something, you may...
Another mom asked me last week how I could possibly have any margin for helping other moms when I’m living in the same chaos. Good question. I’ve been thinking about it ever since she asked. On a practical level, I have the best husband E.V.E.R. who is doing a lot of the practical things such...
When you’re raising a child with extremely challenging behaviors, it can be hard to face a holiday all about giving thanks. Sure, we can all find small gratitudes each day. We have food to eat. We only called the police once last week. The sun came out today. But what about deep gratitude for the...
One of the biggest misnomers for parents when they first encounter trust-based or connected parenting is that it seems like there are no consequences. It feels too permissive. This is actually the reason I tossed the Connected Child aside after reading it pre-placement. Honestly? It made me want to gag. Then we attempted to parent...
I want to be in denial, but the holiday shopping season is sneaking up on us. I’ve also heard that you all have extra essential oils laying around. Maybe you never opened your box or you bought some BOGOs and promptly forgot why. Never fear! I’m here to help you get the most value out of...
Between the breaks in routine, extra sweets, and high anticipation, the holiday season is full of triggers for kids with a history of adverse experiences. I noticed after our first Christmas with our older kids, that tree trimming was a huge trigger because it emphasized all the years they’d missed with us as our younger...
Are you sick of giving choices and compromises and feeling like your life revolves around your challenging child? Are you wondering when healing will ever come and feeling weary? Me too. Sometimes I think, “We’ve been over this 1,000,000 times. When will it sink in?” I feel like “connected parenting” promised me healing, but there...